The Biggest Mistakes Society Makes

Are you frustrated with the events happening in your neighborhood, city, state, country, and/or the world? Have you wondered why history keeps repeating itself? Would you like some insights as to the causes of the problems and the solutions?

If you answered yes to any of the above questions, then read the following with an open mind and you will be able to make more sense out of all the chaos and destruction. In my opinion, there are some basic underlying mistakes that societies keep making that are the causes of our ongoing problems.


A popular quote is: "If you keep doing the same things then expect the same results." Looking back over the history of civilization, there has always been violence, sickness, power hungry people, and greed. What are causing these negative symptoms?

The following are the biggest mistakes that society makes and the solutions. I can write a book about each one. However, here are same basic ones, as I see it as a Marriage, Family Therapist, teacher, mother, and planetary citizen.

1) Mistake: Value and focus mostly on educating the mind and rewarding physical activity (sports).

Truth: We all have four parts which are: mental, physical, spiritual, and emotional. Discounting or ignoring the latter two human parts can lead to disaster.

Action: It is also important to value and focus on the whole being by teaching people how to deal constructively with their emotions, and how to tap into their spirituality, which is their wisdom, unconditional love, and compassion.

2) Mistake: We are naturally good parents who can raise healthy children.

Truth: Most parents learn how to parent from their parents, and the dysfunctional patterns are passed down from generation to generation.

Action: Teach required parenting classes in school.

3) Mistake: Love is all you need for a healthy, successful relationship.

Truth: Love is not enough. It takes two people with high self-esteem and good communication skills to maintain a loving relationship.

Action: Schools offer required healthy relationship classes.

4) Mistake: Every class is an English class.

Truth: Every class is also a self-esteem class.

Action: Help the students feel good by being kind and complimentary to them. Honor and respect them. Tell them they are good enough, worthy, important, and lovable. Encourage them to be who they are. Teach them that mistakes are only lessons and that they are okay.

5) Mistake: People are born good communicators and problem solvers.

Truth: We learn how to communicate and solve problems from our parents, teachers, etc. It is human to have problems. The key is how to express your feelings and desires and create win-win solutions.

Action: Teach required communication and problem-solving classes.

6) Mistake: Teach boys that in order to be a man, they have to be tough (not soft), fearless (not admit their fears or hurts), and aggressive (physically and verbally demanding).

Truth: Boys and men have feelings just like girls and women, and they need to be taught to express them constructively and be assertive (share their truth unconditionally in a kind way).

Action: Encourage men to express their fears and hurts so they do not have to cover them up with anger and hurt others or themselves.

7) Mistake: Power means being in control of others.

Truth: True power is feeling good about yourself and helping others do the same.

Action: Help children feel good about themselves, and teach them how to be kind and supportive of others.

8) Mistake: Treat ailments and illness only on a physical level.

Truth: Most of the time, there is an emotional problem that is causing or aggravating the physical problem.

Action: Treat the whole person and that includes emotional problems.

9) Mistake: Welfare always serves people and our society.

Truth: Just financial support is important and helpful for those who are unable to work. However, when men and women are physically and mentally sound, they feel valued and important when they contribute in some meaningful way, and do something to improve their situation to become financially independent.

Action: Require appropriate hours of community service for able men and women, and offer government education and training for marketable skills.

10) Mistake: Allow bullying, verbal abuse, disrespect, and prejudice.

Truth: These are all symptoms of the person being misinformed or hurting. No matter our color, religion, nationality, we all need and bleed the same and deserve to be respected and accepted.

Action: Have a non-tolerance policy that is strictly enforced for all negative behaviors in school, work place, etc.

11) Mistake: It is helpful to punish people for abusing drugs and alcohol and committing crimes.

Truth: These destructive behaviors are just symptoms of pain and hurt. It is important to deal with the causes through therapy and rehabilitation.

Action: Require counseling and rehabilitation for anyone exhibiting these behaviors and for men and women in prison. The actions above will also help to prevent these problems.

12) Mistake: Focus on materialism for happiness and ignore the consequences to the environment.

Truth: Focus on internal happiness which comes from loving and liking yourself and making a positive difference with others and the planet.

Action: Teach children how to feel good, and be kind and caring to others and the environment.

These are just a few of the mistakes society makes that perpetuate our problems. It is important to always look for the causes of any problem and then take action to resolve it. Only then we can have healthy, fulfilling lives, and peace on earth as one global family.